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Ezekiel Bread tastes legit like cardboard. Hmmm.... fibrous.

So, it’s Friday morning.  You begrudgingly drag your sad frumpy butt out of bed, turn on the Today Show, drink yesterday’s coffee at room temperature, and start to think about what you can drape around your Chubetto bod to make it look as attractive as possible, and oh yeah….what am I going to do for lunch.  If this sounds like your typical Friday, then you’re just like me.  Which also means, you have pretty dismal options for a lunch time respite.  All restaurants within an easy walking distance are ‘C’ level chains (ahem… Au Bon Pain) and you think it’s preposterous to spend 20 minutes waiting in line for a food truck just so you can pay 15 dollars for some iteration of a banh mi sandwich that ol’ dude probably spit in.

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*Alternate title: How Apathy Killed the Day and Saved the Blog.

Oh right, I have a blog.

I’ve been here before.  I’ve taken a hiatus and come back just to blame it on the apathy.  What’s so different this time?  Nothing.  Absoultely nothing.  Were you expecting a different answer based on the way I set that all up?  Shame on you, friend.  Shame. On. You.

To sum it up, I’ve been lazy with posting new blog entries mainly because I’ve felt like nothing I have to say is worth saying.  I never cared in the first place about the success or sustainability of this blog, so that wasn’t a motivating force in my blogging.  In every sense, my attitude towards blogs, blogging, and being a blogger have been apathetic.  Hey, at least I’m consistent.

So now what?

Well, I’m going to continue on from where I left off with no promise of regular posting or quality content.  Place zero expectations on me and I shall meet them!

Let’s kickstart this apathetic jalopy of a blog off with a song!

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Oh the apathy.

Since it’s Friday, and since I can’t imagine any other way in which I want to spend my time this morning, let’s look at some humorous things.  Some random humorous things.  Some humorous random things?

1.  Hanksy.

Go to http://www.woostercollective.com to see the original and other amazing street art.

2.  A Russian lady trying to wake up her adorable orange cat.  Though I do feel uncomfortable when the camera pans down to the cat’s private area.  Have you no shame!?  And furthermore, just let the damn cat sleep!

Thanks bestweekever!

3.  Kimberly Stewart and Benecio del Toro are having a baby.  Um ok, internet.  My brain is unable to process this information.  Can’t. Make. Any. Sense. Of. It.  Does this mean these two had sex?  Ewwww…. I just grossed myself out.

Wait, whaaaaaaaa?

I suppose if you’re into this sort of thing, and don’t lie to yourself, we all know you ARE… then you should go to E online to read more vacuous celebrity news.  This just in!!!  Helen Hunt and Carl Weathers are starting a clothing line!

Happy Friday everyone!  If you need me, I’ll be apathetically lying in bed telling some Russian lady that’s trying to wake me to F off.

Apathy and Art.

Click any of the artworks to be taken directly to Stacey's site.

I love art.  Art, Art, Art.  Buy me some.

Stacey Rozich makes some awesome looking art.  I’m inspired to sit down with some of her pieces and write stories and poems about characters named Yarmoffet and Farly Flippbat.  But then I just watch an episode of Real Housewives of Orange County instead.

Let’s all go to Stacey’s blog.   http://blog.staceyrozich.com/

For more Stacey go here: Read Me!

I never would have believed that many arguments between me and my life partner, here on out referred to as Boy, would be over whether something is beautiful or not.  What a weird thing to argue over.

1.  Succulents.  So beautiful in their alien like appearance.  I want them in every windowsill.  Boy says, “They’re weird looking.  I would eat them.”

Beautiful!

2.  Lady Gaga.  I think she is the hotness.  Boy says to me, “She looks like a dude.  You think models are pretty when they look like guys.  You’re sold on marketing.”

Gorgeous.

3.  Dahlias.  I think these little flowers are so delightful, something straight from Alice in Wonderland.  Boy says, “Ew, they look like burrs.”

Most beautiful burrs in the world.

 

Work that pole girl.

I’m not quite sure when I began to pine for Ms. Martha (in my dreams she orders me to call her that), but I do know that freshman year of college I would ditch my 11:00 class so I could stay home and watch Martha Stewart Living.  Presently, whenever it casually comes up in conversation that I’m completely consumed by all things Martha, I typically get a look of repulsion.  **BREAKING NEWS: A LOT OF PEOPLE DON’T LIKE MARTHA STEWART.

I just don’t understand that sentiment at all.  There are so many reasons to love her.  Read on to see why you should change your mind about Martha.  Ms. Stewart, if you’re nasty.

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I’m Baaaaack.

Ok people.  I’m officially back from my apathetic hiatus.  How did I whip the apathetic demons into a more manageable and submissive state of being?  I exercised yo!

If you need me I’ll be on my clock rug stretchin’ it out.  Waaaay out.